suspended his campaign. This leaves Mitt Romney has the presumptive Republican presidential nominee.
But Romney still has a major problem. There are still a lot of teahadists that don't feel Romney is malevolent enough and don't want him as president. To counter this image problem, he needs to find someone who is extraordinary maleficent to counter his image of being too moderate.
There's been a lot of buzz about Paul Ryan - who wants to screw over the elderly, the disabled and the poor in order to give big tax cuts to the nation's millionaires and billionaires - being a top candidate to being Romney's running mate.
There is some plausibility to this notion. As noted, Ryan is a callous, arrogant jerk, which would balance Romney's image of being a moderate. They both love money and those that have a lot of it. The national Republican chairman is Reince Priebus, who is from Wisconsin, and is a master fundraiser, would smile and bless this union. I'm also sure that Romney is acutely aware of how much a swing state Wisconsin is now, and Ryan as a running mate might make Romney feel he has a shot of winning the state.
Leading up to last week's primary, Romney and Ryan were gushing all over each other. So much so that the Democrats felt inspired to set this political romance to music:
But I've noticed in the last day or so, Ryan has been more assertive and more plaintive in his promoting himself in Romney's eyes. It's like watching an insecure lover try to primp and preen and do whatever to appease his love interest and keep them from leaving him.
And there might be some merit to that feeling.
Before the primaries, not only was Romney singing Ryan's praises, he was also in full-throated support of Scott Walker.
However, Walker was unable to return this public display of affection. Facing a recall, Walker did not want to dare alienate his rabid teahadist base, by schmoozing up to a perceived moderate. So, instead of openly expressing his love for Romney, he sent his campaign chair and controller, Michael Grebe, to show his love for him.
Now, one might very well intuit that Walker, who is the target of Walkergate, a John Doe investigation into his illegal campaigning and other acts of corruption, would be too toxic for Romney to consider as a partner. But who knows? Maybe Romney has a weakness for bad boys. And Walker's been working on that tough biker image for years now.
In fact, I heard Mordecai Lee opine that Walker might be a better choice as a running mate. And there is a certain logic to that as well. Walker is as every bit as malicious as Ryan, maybe even more so. Plus Walker isn't as boring as Ryan is. And I'm sure Priebus would smile and give his blessing to this partnership as well.
One advantage that Walker might give Romney as a running mate is that he's not holding onto the third rail of destroying Medicare like Ryan is.
The way I see it, if Romney picks either of them as a running mate, it's a win-win-win scenario.
If Romney picks Ryan, it opens the door for Rob Zerban even wider and gives that district a chance to have someone that will actually represent them and not Big Money.
If Romney picks Walker, that will give the state a chance to reach some closure as we rid ourselves of the person who caused so much mayhem and chaos in his wake.
And as long as Romney picks either the would be Medicare-destroying Ryan or the recalled and/or indicted Walker, it will all but guarantee a second term for Barack Obama.
In the meantime, it will keep Ryan and Walker busy trying to out-woo the the other that they might forget to do any more damage to our state and our country.
We just have to make sure we have enough hankies on hand for the swain who gets spurned.